QUICK HANDS: Lachie Keith

QH: You’ve been affectionately titled ‘The Devil’. Why?

LK: Not exactly sure to be honest. It happened in Hong Kong. I was a bit of a menace, got enjoyment out of other people’s pain.

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QH: How did the Pixies form?

LK: The Pixies were formed early into the Hong Kong Footy Trip. It’s all a bit of a blur that trip, however I was rooming with Skids (Matt Skidmore) and Gozo (Daniel Harangozo) with JP (Joni Pintal). Essentially we organised immature, annoying pranks on everyone in a group.

QH: You’re in a Kelly Gang style shootout and the Pixies are up against it. Gozo is grappling with a policeman, JP has taken a bullet to the leg and Skidmore is partially on fire. You can only save two, who do you leave and why?

LK: I would probably just take the hit, spread that pixie dust and fly away.

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QH: Personal career highlights at Old Xavs? (One on-field, one off field)

LK: On field would have to be watching Dish (Josh Douglas) pull out of a mark when running back into a pack at the Snake Pit. Followed by the 2016 GF.

Off field, the last two hours on the boat in Hong Kong. Slide the Jaw was all-time.

QH: In your time, who has been the greatest Mayday Mayday performer?

LK: Robbie Ralph! Just ask him and he will tell you all about it.

QH: Who’s in line to take out the Nick Serafini Medal for B@B (Best at Boutique) tomorrow night?

LK: Not too sure, but I think TJ still has more to give so I’ll be keeping a close eye on him.

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QH: Since October 2014 Hong Kong PD have been handling an ongoing Credit Card fraud case. Can you shed any light on the investigation?

Skids Binned

Skids Binned

LK: Mr. Kramer…yeah seeing as the investigation is still open I can’t give too much information. What I can say is Skidmore was found in a public bin and to our delight Mr. Kramer had left his card in the ash-tray section. Next minute The Pixies are in a booth at a gentleman’s club, ordering two drinks each and every female dancer in the joint. It wasn’t long before The Pixies were running out of the joint.

QH: Why is Damo Ryan still bitter towards you?

LK: Before we blame The Pixies, everyone stupidly handed over their key cards to me earlier that night, so I guess they need to take some blame. However, yeah, poor Damo. He tried so hard to be a Pixie and he was close at one point, but he just wasn’t up to it. On the last night we took a visit to a few of the lad’s rooms. I wish I could forget what was happening in Horse and Wynne’s room, but I can’t. Anyway poor Damo happened to be in the next room and was the next victim #RIPEYEBROW

Damo Ryan

Damo Ryan

QH: Where are you most likely to find the Devil at 1am on a Sunday Morning?

LK: Places no one should ever be.

QH: When you found a dead body in your backyard, who did you call to help you out?

LK: I called JP. His brain works differently to anyone. Needless to say he sorted it. No worries!

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