QH: Does a particular flag stand out as the best?
JH: First flag always the most special, u/11’s premiership captain for Kew Rovers with Benny Pirrie winning us the game was pretty special and also pretty strange looking back now.
QH: How many times do you tend to brush your teeth during a week?
JH: It used to be when required, but after a trip to the dentist last year and 13 fillings later, try adopt the once a day policy.
QH: If you get home post football/basketball do you?
a) Quick shower to clean up?
b) Hop in the bath to unwind and clean slowly?
c) Skip the shower and head to the couch/bed?
JH: Although notorious for my bathing habits, usual routine was just to hop into bed, but the wife has strictly forbidden this and it’s straight to the shower to clean the “mud” off.
QH: Your mouth size has been mentioned as being abnormally small. Discuss?
JH: Probably why the teeth cleaning was such an issue.
QH: You've had a number of coaches in your Ménage era. Who would you say the best was?
JH: Halpin’s silver platter speaks for itself, but I formed quite an intimate bond with Motown. Apart from his famous three quarter time Grand Final speech about the best way to defend a lead is to extend a lead – lost by 72 points, Motown respected my wishes to just sit on the wing.
QH: Are you happy to claim you were the first to do a "shoey" which has since been replicated across the globe?
JH: Probably the only sensible thing to after sharing an 8 hour road trip with Ed Lachal.
QH: Looking back are you disappointed that you were continually the worst dressed to Mad Monday each year?
JH: Purely subjective, but somehow I always get stitched up as female.
QH: Who would you say is that best player of your Ménage era?
JH: Goal kicking midfielders usually get the chocolates, but Harry Sleeman (unlike his brother) is an amazing specimen.
QH: Talk us through going grey very early. How have you handled it?
JH: Dabbled in a few products over the years from jet black to chestnut brown, but found the Just for Men actually does only target the greys. I have since ceased this and embraced my roots.
QH: What’s the best sledge you’ve copped about your hair?
JH: Got one a few weeks ago about playing in The Masters.
QH: As a Ménage veteran there are whispers you're not happy with the "rotation" game plan this year and would prefer to be left out on the far wing every week. True or False?
QH: “Tookas Tips” What are they and who was the inaugural winner?
JH: A lot of talk about the goods votes, but people also want to hear the Bonairs. After Sam Adams retired after receiving the inaugural medal, I decided to not conduct the vote count, publicly.
QH: Is it true that when contacted about Quick Hands you already had images on file you wanted to be used?
JH: Need something to show the kids.