QUICK HANDS: Tim Golds

QH: How does such a highly regarded junior athlete knock himself out playing soccer?

TG: The world game uses a shape of ball I am not accustomed to. Trying to do a bit too much with it can cause you to wake up at home in bed six hours later, unaware of what occurred to land you there.

QH: In recent times Boroonadara locals have seen an uplift in dogs ‘relieving’ themselves on lawns. Being a Hawthorn local can you confirm the allegation that it may not be the dogs? 

TG: Funny you mention that, I was just discussing with a colleague that I had noticed an increasing number of owners not picking up after their pet. Appears dogs are getting bigger as well…

QH: How did the self-anointed nickname ‘Teaspoons’ come about?

TG: Unsure about self-anointed, but certainly one I am aware of. Injury prone Old Xavs stalwart M Skene came up with this one following a ‘deal’ that was struck. Safe to say a few my closer mates have embraced it and it still gets thrown. No worries Adsy! (QH hears differently - Tim had claimed he was the "Steak Knives" of the Adam Treloar deal. Kindly he's friends were quick to bring him back down to earth).

QH: You’re a man that likes to keep his emotions in check, but on a recent trip to America things between you and U/19’s coach Declan Pittonet became heated. Quick Hands would like an honest recount of events, including how it made you feel?  

TG: After a long afternoon of beer pong (not my strong point), I was attempting to assist him in redoing his shoe laces. He became restless and one thing led to another. The great man decided to head-butt my fist. Bizarre from him. Regardless we kissed and made up pretty soon after. The one emotion I can recall feeling – sad. Checking the com bank app the next morning was a real eye opener.

QH: Music festivals give people an opportunity to express themselves and let it all hang out. What’s the craziest thing that’s happened to you at a music festival?

TG: I think I know, I have heard of the incident you are referring to. My gorgeous girlfriend Hannah advised me of what occurred after the fact. She was disappointed to say the least. Unsure what she was more disappointed about though… (QH: Tim was tearing the dance floor apart so much so he split his pants and continued to roll with it for the rest of the day)

QH: A close source to Quick Hands has labelled you ‘clumsy’. How do you plead? 

TG: I’m unsure what pleading the 5th means, but I’ll plead that.

QH: How do you react to numerous claims that you peaked as a 12 year old and rode the wave all the way to GWS’s number one pick?

TG: I would describe the journey from kicking 8 goals against Park Orchards with a torn quad one Sunday afternoon at Balwyn Park to the bright lights of Blacktown International Sportspark as….downhill. (QH: Below is actually Tim's AFL Player Profile pic. We would've drafted him with a pill like that as well)

QH: Name a GWS player who wouldn't get a game at OXFC?

TG: He is a huge Old Xavs fan I know, but unfortunately big Adam Tomlinson would likely miss out. The big T-Hawk would not be suited to VAFA football.

QH: James McDonald player vs coach.

TG: Honestly I am thankful that James now knows my name. Certainly avoided him in tackling drills back in the day.